Chapter V: Another World
Wind blew through a dilapidated apartment, the wallpaper hanging in shreds and covered in some... residue. The floor was “wood,” but more accurately described as an insect motel that charged by the hour. Through the one window the hazy outline of Chicago’s skyline could be seen. A paperboy ran down the street yelling “Extra, Extra! Depression hitting new low! President Hoover sends Green to investigate!” Jason awoke with a start, finding himself in the aforementioned apartment with sandpaper sheets. He tried to rise from the bed. This jarring stirred the other occupant, Carl. Carl was a scrawny man standing at 5’2” and 260lb. His hair was thinning, greasy and generally unpleasant. This unpleasantness was amplified when Jason realized they both had no pants on. His hair was thinning, greasy, and generally unpleasant. This unpleasantness was amplified when Jason realized they both had no pants on. “Where you goin’ princess?” he muttered, still half-asleep and hung over. Stifling a terrified scream, Jason did his best to get out of the moldy bed. He began looking for a shower, to clean the mold that coated the bed and now his body; Carl began to rise out of the bed, he too covered in mold, as he mumbled “Baby what’s wrong?” Jason, in his haste to escape from the place of nightmares, jumped directly out of the window, onto the street outside, and began to run in a random direction. “Vanessa, come back!” shouted Carl out the window. Jason decided that he didn’t need to know exactly what had happened, and needed to find his companions. Ignoring Carl’s cries, Jason continued to run until he could no longer hear his cries, and as he looked around, he noticed how run down the buildings were. Ducking into a nearby store, Jason grabbed pants and a coat and slapped them on hurriedly. “Hey baby girl, you gon’ need to pay for that!” Jason noticed how similar this voice sounded to a particular water deity, and turned around hoping to see Nessie. Instead, he came face to face with a large woman standing behind the counter. She wore a dark tan coat and had her hair curled around her head. “You got the cash to pay with?” Ignoring what the woman was saying to him, Jason spoke up, “Oh, Nessie, you look so different, but I’d know that voice anywhere.” He failed to notice how high pitched his own voice was. “Nessie? Girl, what you be talking about?! My name is Bess, only my sisters call me Bessie.” “But you gave me my mission! To find the six talismans! Like this one!” Jason reached into his shirt to pull out the talisman and found an empty string around the neck. “What... what’s going on?” Jason asked as he collapsed to his knees. Or rather... her knees! As he hit the ground he felt his newly acquired bosom bounce with the impact. “Hey child, calm yourself,” Bess said as she put her hands on Jason’s shoulders. Jason did not speak, but instead stared down at his/her new body. The terrible truth began to draw on him. “Now girl, you might be troubled, but I know someone who can help.” Bessie helped Jason to his/her feet, switched the sign over to closed, and lead him/her to a building across the street. The building looked run-down on the outside and Jason/Vanessa/Whaterverhishernamewas didn’t understand who could help him/her in there, but when they entered he/she saw the inside was in prime condition. “Craig!” Bess cried out. “Craig, I’ve got someone here to see you!” “Hold on, I’m almost finished with a client!” a man yelled from across the room, as he cut the hair of another man in a chair, with an apron strapped over his body. The man was moving with amazing deftness. He clipped the other man’s hair in almost an instant and flipped his scissors into a sheathe in his arm. “There you go, pal!” he said, pulling the shawl off of his customer. “Don’t worry about; it’s on the house!” Houf, houf houf!” Jason/Vanessa immediately recognized the laugh. “Grave Digger!” Jason/Vanessa shouted. “Finally I’ve found someone who can understand my dilemma.” The barber looked at him/her like he/she was crazy. “Eh Bess? Who the heck’s this kid?” asked Craig. Jason/Vanessa suddenly realized that he/she wasn’t talking to an enchanted skeleton, but rather a very skinny man with short blonde hair, bony cheeks, and eyes that had been hollowed by years of age. “I’ll go get some beverages,” Bess said as Jason/Vanessa cautiously approached Craig. “And I’ll let you two get introduced.” “You sound like someone I know. I don’t suppose you ever remember meeting me before?” Jason/Vanessa said. “I’d remember a little lady as cute as you,” Craig said, pulling out his scissors. Their handles were engraved with bone, probably antler. “and I don’t, houf. But I’d be glad to get to know you and give you a trim.” At this Jason/Vanessa decided that he/she was in fact, at least as far as these people were concerned, a girl. So she decided to sit down in the chair and let the master perform his work. “This is totally un-c00l,” Jason thought to himself. “I’ve got to find the talisman and get out of this uber-screwed world.” “So where you from, kid?” asked Craig. “Long story,” Vanessa replied. “A very conservative answer, but truth be told we don’t have time for a long story. I gotta get you out of here before too long. Wouldn’t want you two around when unsavory characters come to visit.” “Truth be told,” replied Vanessa, “I don’t have anywhere to go.” “Well, I could let you stay for a little while, but you must leave before the unsavory ones come by.” “I’d love to, but who is this unsavory character you keep talking abou-” and as Vanessa said this the door to the barber shop was kicked in; three people walked in and stood in the doorway. Vanessa looked towards the door and saw a young man, pistol in hand. “Get out of here!” Craig shouted. “You and your ‘friends’ know where you belong, so get out of my shop!” “Shut up, you old tosser!” the young man in the middle, apparently the leader said. “You know the deal; give us the money and we’ll be on our way.” Girl, Craig whispered out of the corner of his mouth, “it’s about time you get out of here. Don’t make eye contact with these punks.” Vanessa didn’t move. “I’m tired of paying you from my handiwork!” Craig shouted as he threw his scissors at one of the thugs, lodging them in his left shoulder. He screamed and fell over. “You boney freak!” he shouted. “Somebody shoot him already!” “I’ll shoot him after he gives me my money,” the leader said. “Now I’ll give you one more chance, old man. Tell me where the money is and hand it over or... I’ll shoot that girl right between her pretty eyes.” “Do I look like I care?” Craig replied. He handed a small knife behind his back to Vanessa, pushed her behind him and charged the hooligans, ready to fight to the death. Suddenly, there was a roar as a Model T crashed through the front door, knocking all of the thugs over to the other side of the room. Stunned, Vanessa and Craig waited for the driver to crawl out. Out stepped a young man with short hair and a driver’s cap. “Vanessa, what the heck are you doing here?!” he asked. “Who the heck are you?!” Craig shouted, staring at the damage done to his place of business. “Glad you asked!” the man exclaimed, striking a pose on his car. “The name’s Blake, and don’t you forget it!” Vanessa would have known that voice and those eyes anywhere. It was Baka! “You’re welcome,” Blake said as he walked over to Vanessa. “I saved your butt again. Will I never get any thanks?” he said right as she pimp slapped him across the room and into the Model T. Category:Chapters